Praxitar: Auto, Pill, or Provider?

All these commercials, lately. Good grief. I don’t remember things being this bad, even a decade ago. I suggest conflating all the car, medication, and cell phone ads into a single thirty-second spot.

When driving your Audi 500, if you feel you may have restless leg syndrome, use Verizon to call your doctor.

Everything fits together if you look hard enough.

Square peg, square hole.

Toups: um
aderack: That is the best thing I’ve seen in my life.
Toups: It’s great on a lot of levels.
aderack: I like the guy’s expression. That seems about right.
aderack: I love the implications of the ad. Okay, our product’s for losers. But COME ON.
Toups: At least it’s honest!
aderack: That’s the thing. It IS.

I hope they don’t harp on this too much, or it’ll get stupid and forced and it won’t be honest anymore.
aderack: I’ve often lamented that ads so rarely say what they mean anymore. Like, fifty years ago you might see “Our food is good — Eat it!” ads.

“Beef! It’s what’s for dinner!” is so hilarious and memorable because it’s just straghtforward. Or close to it, anyway.
aderack: That it’s for a ridiculously broad concept rather than a specific brand helps, of course.
aderack: Still, though. It has the right idea.
Toups: Checkers, a local fast food chain, has the slogan “YOU GOTTA EAT!”
Toups: Which, you know, works for me.
Toups: But they also had “HUMAN FUEL”, the implications of which I disliked, but it’s pretty honest too.
Toups: It highlights the disposable nature of fast food. Which I do appreciate, rather than McDonald’s having “deluxe” meals and pretending to be something they aren’t.
aderack: Well. That should have a second line. “YOU GOTTA EAT — SO EAT HERE!”
aderack: On its own, that leaves the listener thinking “Yeah? Well, that’s right. I do have to eat. Maybe I’ll go to McDonald’s?”
aderack: If you tell someone “Eat at Joe’s”, then, hey, okay. Let’s eat at Joe’s.
aderack: People are suggestable. But you need to suggest, not hint.
Toups: Yeah.
Toups: Though. If it’s placed with an image of checkers food, the “SO EAT HERE” is kind of implied.
Toups: Or, rather, “SO EAT THIS!”
aderack: You need to suggest, not hint.
aderack: I should have gone into marketing.
Toups: yeah you should’ve
aderack: No, then I’d probably kill myself.
Toups: At least you’d be rich!
aderack: And everyone around me.
aderack: With a grenade.